The Mind

 

Have you ever had a distant feeling of home? A feeling you aren't familiar with, but it calls out to you as if it promised prodigious wonders beyond belief, only for you to be damned into spiraling horrors? This is my story.

The chill of the cold winter air was nipping at my nose. My lungs were burning as the sharp air traveled through my body. However, I did not mind. I had been gazing at the endless gray sky for what felt like an eternity. Tall leafy giants towered over me whilst I rested on mounds of snow. I grew even colder as the snow I was lying on began to seep through my hat. I decided to take my mind off of the stinging sensation by closing my eyes and letting my mind travel far, far away. At the beginning, I saw nothing, just a lonesome void that would soon disappear with the opening of my eyes. Then I saw light! I began to doubt what I was witnessing and assumed it was merely the Sun. The light grew closer, and closer, and even closer. It couldn’t be. It is nothing more than the Sun's rays, I thought to myself. Then it hit me. The sky was clouded in gray. The sun wasn’t visible. I opened my eyes and sat up swiftly. My mind was racing. It was difficult to process what I was seeing. I decided to head inside for the day. At the time I didn’t know it, but this single encounter would trigger oncoming blissful, yet damning sights.

I traversed my empty home and opened my bedroom door. As the door creaked I jumped and spun around. “Who’s there?” My voice echoed along the hall. I shook my head in denial and continued to my bed for a well deserved rest.

I awoke to the sound of chattering and plates clattering. It was time for dinner. I followed the sweet smell of plantains to my dinner plate, waiting for me at the table. I was excited to bite into the ripe and sweet plantains, but I wasn’t hungry all of a sudden. I picked at my food with a shallow face. “May I be excused?”

“What for?” my mother asked. I shrugged my shoulders.

“I don’t feel too well.”

“Would you like some medicine?”

“No thank you.” I shoved my plate into the sink. The sighting from earlier that day was itching in my brain. I flopped on my bed, exhausted. Why won’t this thing leave me the hell alone? I asked myself. I buried my face into my pillow.

Before I knew it I was dreaming, a dream of pure bliss. Little did I know, the apex of my nightmares was soon to come. I saw deer striding through endless fields covered in vibrant green. The sun was glaring onto a nearby pond. Everything seemed to be just fine until I woke up. My room was dark, nothing out of the ordinary. I felt a strong presence...a familiar yet distant one. After what I had encountered the other day I would assume this would be a pleasant encounter. Oh lord was I mistaken.

A man with bushy eyebrows and a long pale face approached me from the shadows. A grin stretched across his face from ear to ear. I began to see my room transform into a devilish nightmare. I wanted to run, but I was stuck. I had no other option but to onlook the monstrous display before me. More and more figures, pale and thin, began to emerge from the shadows. The one that frightened me above all the others was a creature with a twisted jaw, blank eyes, and a grimacing gaze. Its guts were exposed by a gashing hole in its torso. It dragged its cold, lifeless hand across my face. My heart was pounding as its cold breaths, lifeless and heavy, skimmed my face. It created an indecipherable mumble that the others seemed to understand. The creature covered its eyes and began screeching as if it was a siren. I layed stiff as a board unable to move. I could feel my heart beating out of my chest. It lunged at me, mouth open. Its array of teeth, glazed in saliva, sunk into my skull.  I closed my eyes and stayed that way for a long time until I mustered the courage to see if they were still there. They disappeared. My room returned to darkness.  I sat upright in my bed. My breaths shivered on their way out. I couldn’t begin to comprehend what I had just witnessed.

Now that I am older I realize the sights I saw were merely a figment of my imagination. Going through sleep paralysis has taught me a valuable lesson of overcoming fears. When I was younger, I would often find myself afraid of the creaking I could hear from my bedroom at night. This is a common fear of course, but I believe that I dropped it sooner than others. Although sleep paralysis is frightening, it taught me to overcome my fears and phobias.

 

 

-Judah