“He passes it up the ice to one of his teammates!”
“He’s heading down the ice!”
“No one is stopping him!”
“He shoots!”
“And he scores!”
“They win the game with a great pass by Bamberger!”
When playing hockey, there are tons of rules and strategies that you need to follow and learn. There are three positions you play in hockey: defense, wing, center, and goalie. Defense is what I play and what I have been playing my whole life. Defense includes the players that are usually the best at skating and are usually the biggest on the ice. Defense plays behind the offense, and they are the players that protect the goalie (we pretty much make sure that the other team doesn’t score).
Wingers are a part of offense. Offense is basically the front line. Wingers play on the sides of the center. They are the ones that are scoring and are usually the fastest on the team. They usually have the best handles (how good you can handle the puck), and they have very good footwork.
Center is probably the easiest position. You are the player that is best conditioned and can shoot the puck really well. Center is the leader. You are usually the smallest player (that is part of the reason why they are so fast, because they are very light). The centers are usually the players that are all over the place and also have very good footwork.
The goalie is the player that is in the net and blocks pucks from getting in that net. He wears the most pads to protect himself from getting hurt. The goalie is usually the tallest on the team.
When all the positions get together they make a hockey team. The defense, wingers, and center all work together to score goals and make plays. Overall, they work together to be successful and win all the games they can. All of the positions make plays before the game so that they can be ready when they get on the ice. When the team works together they can never lose. Teamwork is a sense of unity. Teamwork brings people together and motivates them to rely on one another to get things done.
-Oliver G.
Oliver, you have a good lesson at the end of your writing when you said “Teamwork is a sense of unity. Teamwork brings people together and motivates them to rely on one another to get things done.” You described everything nicely like when you said, “Defense includes the players that are usually the best at skating and are usually the biggest on the ice. Defense plays behind the offense, and they are the players that protect the goalie (we pretty much make sure that the other team doesn’t score).
ReplyDeleteWingers are a part of offense. Offense is basically the front line. Wingers play on the sides of the center. They are the ones that are scoring and are usually the fastest on the team. They usually have the best handles (how good you can handle the puck), and they have very good footwork.
Center is probably the easiest position. You are the player that is best conditioned and can shoot the puck really well. Center is the leader. You are usually the smallest player (that is part of the reason why they are so fast, because they are very light). The centers are usually the players that are all over the place and also have very good footwork.
The goalie is the player that is in the net and blocks pucks from getting in that net. He wears the most pads to protect himself from getting hurt. The goalie is usually the tallest on the team.” This shows that you know a lot about all of the different positions in hockey.
I really like the way that the writing started with “He passes it up the ice to one of his teammates!” “He’s heading down the ice!” “No one is stopping him!” “He shoots!” That is such a great line because it is known by anyone; even people who don’t play hockey. The description of each position is really great too, although some places have different nicknames for some positions. Like left wing and right wings we call wing 1 and wing 2 not wingers, but it is just broad enough that it’s easy to know what position is being talked about. That really makes it an all inclusive piece for anyone to read.
ReplyDeleteThe central idea in this story is teamwork. This is a very important skill to have in life as it presents itself in so many situations. One of the most moving lines in your story was “When the team works together they can never lose. Teamwork is a sense of unity.”. In addition, there were some words that made me feel more engaged like “Conditioned” and “Unity”.
ReplyDeletewhen you were talking about all the hockey positions it kind of relates to baseball because when all the team comes together we do really well; ¨ When all the positions get together they make a hockey team.¨what i liked about your writing piece it has good organization and wording.
ReplyDeleteTeamwork means to have positive relationships with all of your teammates, and helping one another. This passage showed teamwork when Oliver said, “The defense, wingers, and center all work together to score goals and make plays." One thing that I liked is how you organize your passage by position.
ReplyDeleteOliver, I love the story but I especially love how you put me right in the middle of a hockey game. It makes me really engaged, and all your information about the different positions separated into different paragraphs is great. It makes me think about the different positions and what they do. I also love the sentence, “When all the positions get together they make a hockey team. The defense, wingers, and center all work together to score goals and make plays.” It brings me back into the story and has a very powerful ending.
ReplyDeleteI can relate to this because I played defense in soccer. In both hockey and soccer the players want to score a goal and help their team win. Both sports require teamwork and good communication with your teammates.
ReplyDeleteI like from Oliver G's. story was about hockey because of teamwork when Olive said when all the positions get together they make a hockey team. Which means that all the positions get together. They make great teamwork when they make great plays they can win games when all the positions are successful on the ice. The things I like about your writing piece are that it is a good organize by teamwork.
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